


Chase away the ghosts you've been burdened with

by Amazaria



Category: One Piece
Genre: Gen, I hate Arlong, Jinbe please, Luffy loves his crew but what's new, Nami also hates Arlong, On a different note, What happened to Nami is NOT your fault, hurt/comfort of some kind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 19:19:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18350060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amazaria/pseuds/Amazaria
Summary: "- Aladine warned me," whispers Jinbe. "He warned me, but when I heard nothing from the Marines, I thought he was being- better. That was foolish of me, I suppose.""- He was your brother," says Nami, like that excuses anything, like her mother didn't die because Jinbe wanted to believe his little brother had changed.(or: in which Jinbe and Nami have a conversation about a common acquaintance of theirs.)





	Chase away the ghosts you've been burdened with

 

_"What are we fighting for?_

_I don't know why;_

_An eye for an eye will leave the whole world blind."_

                                                                                         The Federal Empire, What Are We Fighting For [(x)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWSWNASGyMA)

 

 

 

 

It happens in the middle of a party.

Because Jinbe's the newest member, and because " _he's so cool, so he must know cool stories!_ ", he's the one recounting his past this time. It's late, late enough for the moon to be high in the sky. The stars are shining ahead, the sea is calm, the air is a little chill, but the warm atmosphere more than makes up for it. Zoro's asleep against the mast, Chopper curled up against his side, valiantly fighting his tiredness to listen to the helmsman. Robin volunteered to do the dishes this time, and though Sanji initially protested heavily, he seems to have forgotten all about it now, smiling and laughing along the rest of the crew. Nami is on his right- actually, she's between Zoro and Sanji, in what Jinbei suspects to be a well-thought-out plan to dissuade the two from breaking into a fight. She has a leftover piece of cake from dinner in front of her, one that Jinbe is very surprised to see has survived Luffy's appetite, but her focus is on the straw hat in her hands that she's carefully repairing, once again.

Right next to Sanji is Usopp, who seemed to be listening attentively at the start but is now drawing something in his sketchbook, muttering to himself as he does so. Jinbe's not sure if this is a plan for a weapon or a simple drawing, but every then and again, Luffy leans unnaturally over to see and says something to his sniper that Jinbei can't quite hear, but it never fails to make Usopp grin a little brighter. Franky, who's right next to Usopp, is as engrossed in Jinbe's stories as he was in the beginning and keeps on denying that he's crying- which he is. Finally, between Franky and Jinbe is Luffy, his grin the brightest thing in sight for miles. Brook is on watch, even though Zoro offered to take his place earlier, and sometimes bits of melodies come down from the crow's nest.

There had been a violent storm much earlier, at the break of dawn; all of them had wrestled with Mother Nature for hours before they finally managed to escape the waves, winds or sentient, pointy rocks. Jinbe is exhausted, but the rest of the crew doesn't seem nearly as tired as him, probably because they weren't on watch before the storm. He should probably go to sleep- but, well, he's not immune to his captain's charisma yet. He suspects none of his crewmates completely are.

So he stayed, and he's in the middle of telling stories of his former crew, of his family, of Tiger and Aladine and Koala and all those who have been lost.

It's been a long time since he allowed himself to think about them. It's been a long time since he  _talked_ about them, because Tiger's death is an open wound still, because every time he thinks about his first captain, there's something in him that wants to revolt and scream and make the world  _pay._

It's been a long time, and maybe that's why it happens

He's in the middle of another meaningless story, laughing at his crewmates' antics while retelling old stories when-

"- And Arlong was so  _mad-_ but we couldn't stop laughing either way!"

He realizes what he said and immediately falls silent.

It's easy, at this particular moment, to see who joined the crew in East Blue and who didn't- Franky is laughing loudly and Chopper is giggling along, but they're the only one to do so. Sanji and Usopp are frozen for a second before Sanji mutters something under his breath and straightens, and Usopp sneaks a less-than-subtle look at Nami. Zoro's eye is almost open and the swordsman is looking in Luffy's direction, of course- but the captain doesn't seem to have noticed anything.

There's an odd, awkward silence that Jinbei's never heard on the crew before, then, because Chopper and Franky seem to understand what just happened and fall silent instantly. Luffy's the only one still laughing, oblivious, but even he can't ignore the tense atmosphere for this long, and he looks around for a second before turning his eyes, dark and sharp and serious in a way that feels both dangerous and reassuring, somehow, to Jinbe.

And then-

In the most embarrassing manner possible-

Jinbe- helmsman of the future Pirate King and fifth Yonko, former captain of the Sun Pirates, former Warlord, Knight of the Sea, renowned and feared pirate- who has faced horrors and monsters and more insanity than most people ever will- Jinbe-

Flees.

He doesn't let his captain utter a single word, doesn't  _dare_  look in Nami's direction, mutters something about having to go replace Brook -which is a complete lie, since he was on watch  _yesterday-_ and gets in the crow's nest as fast as possible.

And  _then,_ after chasing Brook from his spot despite his protests, he lets himself think, realizes what he just did, and groans.

Tiger would be laughing  _so hard._

oOo

 

(Tiger- Seas, but Jinbe  _misses_ Tiger.

It's been so long, and it's somewhat faded, now, but-

Tiger had been his brother, his captain, and he had been so  _good._ He had tried to make the world better, and he had  _succeeded,_ at least for some people; he's the reason why Jinbe's a pirate, and he's the reason why Jinbe didn't lose himself to the same hate that had consumed Hody, and hundreds of other fishmen too.

Tiger had been- not gentle, and kind, as Queen Orihime had been. No, he had been angry, and rightfully so- he had been driven to save people, to fix the world, because nobody else was going to do it if he didn't do it. He- he had been good, but out of spite, as an act of defiance to the World Government.

Tiger had been angry, and hurt, and damaged, and he had still ordered his death to be kept a secret, because the next generation  _had to have a chance._

And Arlong heard that, heard his final plea, and he had still killed the mother of two children, had still forced Nami to work for him and risk her life to save her family, like Tiger's last word had meant nothing to him, like  _Tiger himself_  had meant nothing to him.

Sometimes Jinbe thought of that, and wondered if Arlong had ever been a good person, or if he had just been looking for a reason to hurt human all along.

But thinking like that hurt too much, so mostly Jinbe missed Tiger and tried to live up to his former captain's expectations.)

 

oOo

 

He's been alone for at least a good twenty minutes before someone comes to talk to him.

He hears light footsteps behind him, and when he turns around, he's faced with Nami's exasperated expression.

He winces. She doesn't seem mad, per se; but she's not happy either.

She sighs; it's a long sigh, a familiar one, that she uses when Luffy fell overboard or when Zoro started training two days after nearly dying. It's a sigh that's nearly always followed by a muttered "I'm surrounded by  _idiots_." and a round of screaming.

It's the first time Jinbe has ever seen it directed at himself.

Nami shakes her head and lets herself fall onto the bench attached to the walls. Luffy's hat is still in her hand, finally fixed and looking like nothing ever happened to it; for a brief moment, Jinbe wonders how many time the navigator repaired her captain's hat since the start of their journey- wonders what it means, exactly, that she's the only one allowed to do so. On any other ship, it might have been a show of trust, a way to place the redhead above the rest of the crew- on Sunny, it's probably just a habit leftover from the earliest days on the weakest sea, when Nami was the only one who knew how to sew.

Jinbe's jostled out of his thoughts by Nami's soft voice.

"- I have a sister, you know."

He hesitates to tell her that yes, he does know. He interrogated Hachi about Nami, during the two years the Strawhats spent separated; learning Arlong had killed the mother of not only one but two little girls had been both painful and enraging, and Hachi had backed away from him as quickly as possible, possibly out of fear, possibly to leave him space. He doesn't quite know; the sheer heartbreak he had felt at the moment had obscured his vision- or maybe it had been the tears.

"- Her name is Nojiko," Nami continues, in a soft tone of voice he rarely gets to hear, a small smile on her face. "She's older than me, but I was always the most reckless of us two, so when Belmer died, I decided it was up to me to protect her."

He tenses.

"- There are only a few people on the crew that have siblings, you know. Zoro and Brook might- I don't know anything about their family. I don't think they do, though. Robin doesn't, obviously, and if Chopper did they all abandoned him. Sanji- well, Sanji's family is Zeff, and that's it. Usopp's dad left too quickly. So, out of all of us- really, Franky has Iceburg, I have Nojiko, and Luffy- well, Sabo and Ace."

Her voice quietens at Ace's name, in a way it did not at Belmer's. It's that Ace's death is mangled with so many things- loneliness and failure and wounds.

And it's not hers, not completely- it's Luffy's grief, mainly, but everything on this crew is shared, a mess of joy and loss, so complicated that Jinbe feels clumsy around it, while the others navigate it without seeming to think.

"- The point of all this is- I know what it feels like, to have a sibling. I couldn't hurt Nojiko even if she had killed hundreds. I don't- you have to understand, Jinbe, that I don't  _blame you_ , for not stopping him."

There's almost a pleading edge to Nami's sentences, now, a softness and concern he doesn't quite feel like he deserves.

(Besides, she doesn't need to blame him. He blames himself.)

"- Luffy stopped him. It was horrible, and I won't ever forgive him, but- it's done. I never would have met him and the others without him- some good came from it, at least."

She sighs, apparently at a loss for words. Finally, she stands up and reaches out to put a hand on his shoulders- Jinbe very pointedly does not look at her at all.

"- My point is- You can talk about him. I won't break."

He stays completely still for a moment, face unreadable.

"- I might."

oOo

 

(Jinbe never got along well with Arlong.

It didn't make him less of his brother, but it's the truth; Jinbe had disregarded Arlong's company, preferring the military and its set of clear rules to the somewhat-cutting edge of his brother's laugh.

They still loved each other, or so he likes to believe; but-

Well. They didn't have much to talk about, and neither had ever reached out to fill the gap between them after Tiger's death.

Sometimes Jinbe wonders what could have changed if he had only just  _tried._ )

 

oOo

 

There's understanding on Nami's face, gentle compassion she doesn't manifest often, that makes her looks kinder and less fierce than usual.

(Jinbe's not sure he deserves it.)

"- I-", he says, looking at the window behind her, wondering if maybe he shouldn't just stay silent. "It's just-", he tries again, and sighs, feeling exhausted beyond his years. "Arlong and I were never close, not like you and Nojiko are, or how Ace and Luffy were, or even Franky and Iceburg, from what I heard. We had many divergences of opinion, but he was still- he was still-"

"-Your brother."

"-Yes," he whispers, finally lifting his gaze from the window to find Nami looking at him with some sort of pity he doesn't quite understand.

"- He was never-," he wants to say  _good_ , but if he says it out loud he thinks it might break him, so he settles for a gentler term: "-kind. I never thought it too strange; we had all been raised in a somewhat lonely setting, and I thought it was just his way to protect himself from- everything, I guess."

He sees Nami opening her mouth to say something, but sends her a look, pleading for her to let him finish; he's not sure he will have the courage to do this again, to dig up painful memories, to explain how and why thinking of his brother hurts.

"- I knew he was aggressive, almost violent; I knew he hated humans a lot; but I never thought- I should have known."

"- You couldn't have known- how could you have known? He was your brother, Jinbe; it was normal for you to be blinded by your memories when it came to him."

It feels like cold, cold, cold comfort.

"- The first thing I did as a Shichibukai was free him, you know," he says, not caring that he has told her the story already, lost in memories and regrets. "The very first thing. And when he told me he was going to form his own pirate crew- I should have known, that he wasn't going to listen to Tiger. I should have  _known,_ he never agreed to it, he hated humans too much, thought himself always superior to  _everyone,_ and I- I let him go regardless."

"- You thought he was better than he really was," says Nami quietly, not looking at him. "I did that mistake too; thought he'd keep his word. He fooled us both, in the end."

She laughs hollowly, and for a moment the crow's nest is terribly silent, the atmosphere heavy and charged with painful memories.

"- Aladine warned me," whispers Jinbe. "He warned me, but when I heard nothing from the Marines, I thought he was being- better. That was foolish of me, I suppose."

"- He was your brother," says Nami, like that excuses anything, like her  _mother_ didn't  _die_ because Jinbe wanted to believe his little brother had changed.

"- I always thought we -humans and fishmen- could be better. I always believed that we could fulfill Tiger and Queen Orihime's dreams, live up to their expectations, and so when I didn't hear anything about Arlong- I wanted him to have changed so bad, I wanted to believe that he had heard me, or had remembered Tiger's words, but  _of course_  he hadn't. I guess- I guess I let my dreams blind me. That was- stupid. I should have known better."

Nami looks at him sharply then, and she looks like she does when she's scolding Luffy for falling overboard or screaming at Zoro and Sanji for fighting.

"- We're a crew of dreamers, Jinbe," she states. "Do you know how many people called my dream stupid, and foolish, and impossible? That doesn't matter, because our captain's dream is to be Pirate King, and if he can do that -and he will-, then the least we can do for him is the impossible."

He looks at the hat she still holds in her hands infinitely delicately, thinks of his captain, and-

"- I- yes, of course."

She smiles, then- just like that, the tension in the air is gone, and she looks fond and amused.

"- Now, then. I already said it, but I guess I'll do it again: I never blamed you. And since I'm the one who suffered most-" and she says it like a challenge, with a hint of a smile "- then I order you to stop blaming yourself."

He blinks at her, and she softens.

"- Let it go, Jinbe. It's over, and he led me to Luffy. There's no use in holding on to what you should have done, not when it'll never happen anyway. And- if you want my opinion- he was never worthy of being your brother anyway."

There's something like tears in Jinbe's eyes, something like gratitude and sorrow fighting each other in his heart.

"- Come on," says Nami, not noticing or not caring. "If you don't finish your stories now, Luffy will never let you go to sleep, and you look like you need it."

He follows her and realizes that she's right; he's feeling exhausted, but physically, not emotionally, as he feared at the start of the discussion. He thinks about protesting and trying to apologize again, but-

(Maybe he's starting to believe Nami when she says it wasn't his fault.)

oOo

 

("- Luffy," says Nami sternly when Jinbe tries to go to bed. " Luffy, there's a storm coming tomorrow, and if our helmsman sleeps through it because of you I'm going to  _drown you._ "

"- You're  _mean,_ Nami," complains Luffy, but lets Jinbe pull himself up and immediately launches himself at his sniper. "Usopp, Usopp, tell a story!"

Jinbe almost misses the weigh of the straw hat Luffy gently set on his head.

"- I'm going to  _sleep,_ Captain. I can't wear a hat," he protests half-heartedly.

"- Don't care," calls Luffy, his grin happy and free and the most precious thing in the world-

-and then Jinbe has his arms full of a rubber boy, and Luffy looks at him, still grinning.

"- You're the  _best_ helmsman  _ever_ , Jinbe," he says seriously. "I'm so glad you joined my crew!"

"-Luffy!," calls Nami sharply, and her captain smiles at Jinbe, sheepish, and lets him go from the hug.

"- I'm glad I'm here too, Captain," he says, because even if it's the most obvious thing ever he  _needs_ to say it. "I'm really glad."

Luffy grins.)

**Author's Note:**

> I started this one so far back... Nami is my favorite, and Jinbe's relationship with her I always liked, so it made sense, but as I wrote I found myself really enjoying writing about Jinbe and Arlong, and what they took from Tiger's death
> 
> It really fascinates me, how Arlong took Tiger's death as a justification for his actions and his hate, when Jinbe took it as a reminder to never hate someone like the Celestial Dragon hated the fishmen. It really separates them as characters, I think; and it stops anyone from excusing Arlong's actions, because Jinbe suffered the same as he did, and he didn't turn out like that, so what excuse does Arlong have?
> 
> I don't know. I really like Jinbe's character- I'll probably write about him again.
> 
> Hopefully you've liked this story!


End file.
